Recently there was a mail highlighting what is goodness according to Vedas. It listed  a few attributes of "goodness".

- Steadfastness
- Forgiveness
- Good conduct
-Non-appropriation and avoidance of theft
- Control of the senses
- Wisdom
- Learning
- Truthfulness
- Absence of anger

Although the mail listed them as ‘according to Vedas’ , they are in any case attributes of basic goodness which ever religion philosophy you choose !!

But the list set a ball rolling .

Steadfast literally means fixed in place, but is chiefly used figuratively to indicate undeviating constancy or resolution: steadfast in one's faith.

The dictionary meaning includes sure, dependable, reliable, constant, unwavering. Steadfast, staunch, steady imply a sureness and continuousness that may be depended upon.

But to be part of goodness the steadfastness has to be about good things. One can be steadfast in his beliefs without applying logic . So steadfastness about good things is the real thing.

Then comes forgiveness.

Every moment , every day events keep happening , words are exchanged .

Anger is generated.

Anger is suppressed.

It happens in the office .

It happens at home.

It happens among friends .

Events are stored and friends and enemies are re classified.

We continuously increase the baggage !!

We need a tool to reduce that irrelevant baggage !

Forgiveness is that forthright tool.

Forgiveness in business parlance is like  “cutting losses and moving on”

Forgiveness.

Unlike steadfastness this is a stand alone attribute.

It stands on its own pedestal.

Independent of everything this attribute gives enormous scope for generating peace . A peace which may be simple relief, which can only experienced and not described.

It part of experiencing the so called Brahman.

When one cannot forgive , one  has to carry the entire baggage of the event and the details , - to continuously justify to oneself why he need not forgive.

But once forgiven the slate is clean you do not have to carry the baggage.

For the sake of argument one can always say no 'I do not carry the baggage' and but 'I do not forgive' !!

That is only a statement – because the person who committed the so called infuriating offense remains part of the “others” whose contact is abhorred , or avoided. At every mention of that person who committed that infuriating offense , there is instant hatred !

 So the unforgiving person unconsciously carries the burden of carrying on his mental battle against that invisible person. He may say I do not care , but cares enough to carry the grudge.

Imagine the other side.

But once forgiven , you carry less baggage ; Effectively the your burden is gone and it is shifted to the one so forgiven .

It is a different story that many a time the one so “forgiven” may not even know his offense or that he is forgiven etc . And one may tend to feel what is the use of forgiving such a person.

But in reality when one forgives one is free of all that burden

Is it that simple ?

Of course there are complications. Particularly if the one to be forgiven is himself

This can happen If one has not done his duty  as required. Instead of owning up the responsibility  one starts finding scapegoats for what should have been done by himself . Then that person is only on a path of spreading his guilt on others.

Path here too is straight forward.

One cannot always undo the past. Stop looking for scapegoats. Recognize one own inability to perform as required as the real cause. Own up the ultimate responsibility. Recommit oneself not to repeat that past mistake . Then forgive oneself and move on !!

Everybody has some thing or some one to forgive – Forgive and feel the lightness and move on

As  I said forgiveness stands on its own pedestal !

om tat sat

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